Drunken Privateers
by queenpearl
Summary: Bluenose gets the base's schooners into trouble, again...


**7451: There are to be no more drinks of any kind allowed on Naval Station Halifax due to excessive drunken activities at ungodly hours in the morning.  
7451a: The names of those responsible are being withheld as we need them on the line not in the drydocks as the rest of the fleet would send them. **

It was past 3 in the morning and the base's schooner compliment was acting like it was 3 in the afternoon. Loud music could be heard throughout their own corner of the base with many ships dancing on the makeshift dance floor. Others sat at the bar with at least one engaged in a shot contest. At a nearby table sat 6 schooners all veterans of the Grand Banks. Bluenose, Delawana, and Halagonian for the Canadians and Gertrude L. Theabuad and Columbia, and Mayflower for the Yanks. They were all rip roaring drunk. Past that in fact. They were the point where, just before passing out, they were all about to do something silly.

Bluenose, being the champion she was and the ringleader of any mischief occurring on base, started the festivities...

 _"_ _Oh the year was 1778  
HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW!  
A letter of marque came from the King  
To the scummiest vessel is ever seen._

 _Goddamn them all!  
I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold  
We'd fire no guns, shed no tears!  
Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier  
The last of Barrett's Privateers!_

Theabaud led the next verse...

 _Oh Elcit Barred cried the town  
HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW!  
For twenty-five men all fishermen who  
Would make for him the Antelope's crew._

 _Goddamn them all!  
I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold  
We'd fire no guns, shed no tears!  
Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier  
The last of Barrett's privateers!_

Haligonian stood up shakily in her chair, swaying half with the song, half with the booze she'd already consumed.

 _The Antelope sloop was a sickening sight  
HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW!  
She'd a list to port and her sails in rags  
And a cook in the skuppers with the slaggers and the jags_

 _Goddamn them all!  
I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold  
We'd fire no guns, shed no tears!  
Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier the last of Barrett's privateers!_

It was Columbia's turn now and she grinned and winked suggestively at Bluenose who's cheeks turned red at the obvious flirting.  
 _  
On the King's Birthday we put to sea  
HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW!  
We were 91 days to Montego Bay  
Pumping like madmen all the way!_

 _Goddamn them all!  
I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold  
We'd fire no guns, shed no tears!  
Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier  
The last of Barett's privateers!_

The last of the Canadians, little Delawana was next. She was a head shorter than Bluenose but the firey redhead was no slacker.

 _On the 96th day we sailed again  
HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW!  
When a bloody great Yankee hove in sight  
With our cracked four pounders we made to fight_

 _Goddamn them all!  
I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold  
We'd fire no guns, shed no tears!  
Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier  
The last of Barrett's privateers!_

Mayflower, the huge saltbanker always denied the chance to sit with the big boys now looked uncertain about her once desired position. She looked to Bluenose and Columbia. The Canadian gave her a nod and the ever excitable Yank an encouraging thumbs up! Gathering her courage, Mayflower rose to the challenge.

 _The Yankee lay low down with gold  
HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW!  
She was broad and fat and loose in the stays  
But to catch her took the Antelope two whole days!_

 _Goddamn them all!  
I was told I'd cruise the seas for American gold  
We'd fire no guns, shed no tears!  
Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier the last of Barrett's privateers!_

All standing, Bluenose took the lead into the next verse.

 _Then at length we stood two cables away  
HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW!  
Our cracked four pounders made an awful din  
But with one fat ball the Yank stove us in!_

 _Goddamn them all!  
I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold  
We'd fire no guns, shed no tears!  
Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier  
The last of Barrett's privateers!_

Each schooner raised their glasses of fine Nova Scotian brew. Each glass more empty than the other but none were even half full. Bluenose, Theabuad, Halagonian, Columbia, Delawana, and Mayflower all sang as a toast to the brilliant Canadian man that had created such a popular song!

 _The Antelope shook and pitched on her side  
HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW!  
Barrett was smashed like a bowl of eggs  
And the main truck carried off both my legs._

 _Goddamn them all!  
I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold  
We'd fire no guns, shed no tears!  
Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier  
The last of Barrett's privateers!_

As each ship prepared to drink, Mayflower spoke up. "Oh there's one more verse!" She said and lead them into it.

 _So here I lay in my 23rd year  
HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW!  
It's been 6 years since we sailed away  
And I only made Halifax yesterday_

 _Goddamn them all!  
I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold  
We'd fire no guns, shed no tears!  
Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier  
The last of Barrett's privateers!_

Their song and toast completed the schooners all drained their glasses in unison, slamming them down on the table with a loud clunk. It was only then they noticed how quiet the room has gotten. A quick glance towards the door told them why for there stood the Admiral in her nightgown and looking very, very displeased!

Each ship gulped audibly, then they did what schooners did when confronted with danger. They ran in all different directions, screaming at the top of their lungs. Bluenose dove between the Admiral's legs, making it out into the hallway. Mayflower dove out the window and hit the ground running, meeting up with her Canadian counterpart as she burst outside. Delawana followed Mayflower. Columbia and Theabaud tipped over chairs and tables to block the Admiral's path before escaping. And Haligonian, well Haligonian thought for some reason stripping down would help her chances and ran out of the building naked.

It wasn't long before a makeshift strip dance party insued in the courtyard. One that woke the rest of the base in a hurry. Each shipgirl's reaction varied.

Some, like the Edwardian sensitive Olympic-class immediately turned away to shield their eyes.

Most watched the proceedings with interests with a select few such as the shameless flirt HMS Repulse admired some of the schooner's assets.

But no one was amused the next morning to find that the Admiral had posted a rule banning all alcohol from the base. When the mob marched down to the schooner barracks they found that it had been meticulously stripped and abandoned without a single can of food or a piece of sail remaining!


End file.
